Tuesday, July 19, 2011

What do you think of this breakup?

So him & I had feelings for each other for almost 2 years. (It would be 2 years in October.) & I couldn't date him cause I wasn't allowed, so he waited. That summer we had fallen in love. A year passed & in November after him bugging me I asked my parents tons of times & we were official. We were so happy.. We were best friends first & I never wanted to lose that. Are relationship was good, but we had our fights. This past May i was so stressed w/ so much **** going on. But he was always there listening even if I couldn't say anything. Towards the end of the month was exams, & for some reason I was just so mad at him for stupid reasons. I ignored him & he tried to be there, but then he gave me space. The last day of exams Idky but I was just so furious & there were so many times I wanted to run up into his arms & apologize but I couldn't. I felt like something was up with him. So during our class I went up to him & whispered "its' over" at the time idk what i was expecting, i just wanted to see if he would say anything. He said nothing & i was so upset. That day he broke up with me telling me he didn't love me like he did & didn't care as much & that we are only teenagers there are other guys out there for u. He wanted the old me back & he said things could happen in the future again. I figured he liked this other girl b/c it was the only other girl he would hang around. A week past & we were talking a little bit. Then he said to meet up cause he had to tell me something, but he couldn't hold it in & he told me he ****** up & he lied to me, he stilled loved me & he wanted it to be easier to let go.. He said so many times he wanted me back & things for us could work out. I was so happy. We met up & it was him. We both apologized for our mistakes & wanting to take a break so we could appreciate each other better & not take one another for granted again. He kissed me twice.. not knowing it would be our last kiss.. Our break was going to end when we came back from vacation, so we could both go away & then see where we were at. During my vacation I said something that i regret now & he took it the wrong way a little, but i said i hated being single b/c u lose a special friendship & it wasn't all about him. Which it was I just didn't want to sound desperate. He said that he was holding me back & I should date someone else for awhile. But he never mentioned himself. He said if any girl hit on him he would want it to be me.. 3 days later a week ago from today he texted me saying we should see other ppl & that i should move on from him b/c he doesn't love me anymore & likes someone else. After thinking for a few days everything was going ok & we were going to get back together he asks my best friend on a date. Thankfully she denied it, but it was just wrong. I'm on vacation & i have to deal with this. I was heartbroken & still am.. What's worse is that he wanted me to get over him so he could go out with her & how it was unfair how i'm friends with everyone so it would be hard to get my approval.. After all we've been through it wasn't him, but he said ppl change & his feelings change.. But just like that? I blocked him on fb b/c i would be looking at his pg constantly & i need to move on but it's so hard. I still love him, maybe not the same but it's like he doesn't care. He's changed & everyone loved him. My friend said you can't find many guys like him & its true. He was everything.. Is it b/c he just figured while we are broken up move on? He broke my heart twice & he just uses the lame excuses that aren't him. I miss him. I always think if he loved me at all he wouldn't have fallen out of love like that & hurt me, so i don't really think he loved me at all.. Even though he says he did & everything was real. My guy friend says its not him & he's turned into a jerk & doesn't know what he wants. but i can't take him back. As much as I want to I can't. He can hurt me again so easily. I've learned my mistakes & realize them but why is he doing this? He always said "all i need is you" & he would never hurt me & break up with me. I never believed it until 2 months ago.. Little did i know..But asking my best friend on a date? Why do guys do this? Thank you for reading.

No comments:

Post a Comment